Where do you go when you're a celebrity and you want to cleanse your soul and that of your children? If you are Madonna or Demi Moore you head to Tel Aviv, Israel, to celebrate the Jewish New Year.
Ok, so Demi didn't take her "real" children but she did take Ashton!
Thumbnails below are of Demi and Ashton.
Madonna has always been a "take charge" girl so Madonna carrying a bag with a Purple Penetrator in it isn't all too surprising.
You know she was carrying it for someone. Perhaps a gift for Gwyneth Paltrow?
Fresh off the 10th anniversary party for the GQ Men of the Year Awards, Madonna and husband Guy Ritchie spent another night out drinking - this time at Harry's Bar in London's Mayfair.
An inebriated Madge just about flashed her va-jay-jay getting into her car. Thought I suspect she was wearing panties.
My girl Madonna was all prim and proper at the 10th anniversary party for GQ Men of the Year Awards in London Tuesday night.
No wedding ring? *GASP!* The world will be talking.
** Don't forget: Most pictures on Celebrity Upchuck can be clicked on for a closer look and most are high-res.**
There are rumors that Madonna will join Justin Timberlake for a MTV's VMA's in September. Oooooo, Madonna and Mr. JT. YUMMY!
In the meantime, I'll settle for pics of her leaving her London gym.
Took this pic of my girl at her Miami concert last July.
No, I didn't forget. Madonna has me on speed dial and called a minute ago to wonder why the hell I haven't wished her a rockin' birthday on Upchuck so here you go Madge!
You are an original, an innovator, the queen of reinvention...you dance, sing, get up and do your thing...despite the haters. LONG LIVE MADONNA!
Now, enough with the corn. Rumor has it Madonna is planning to celebrate her 50th birthday on August, 16, 2008, with a very special concert in NYC's Central Park. Ugh, Central Park in August...prepare to pass out people.
A source tells Britain's Sun, "One of the ideas she loves is to do Central Park on her birthday. She came up with it and has been discussing it as a serious possibility...She doesn't like getting older but she knows there's no way she can pretend her birthday isn't happening...She is planning to kick off a world tour next June in America to promote her new album. Playing at Central Park would be the highlight...She sees it as a huge televised event."
Are you reading this Ang? I will have given birth by then so we will have to high-tail our arses to NYC for a quick concert! Ya hearrrrd. Oh, and Amy, we'll be staying at your place. ;)
This is a pic of my post-concert celebratory toast (Patron and Corona) in Miami last year. In your honor Madge, I will recreate said toast this evening. Your welcome. ;)
Madonna in London 7/20/07
We know Madonna is the best (well, those of us who are brilliant think so) and here's some insight into her upcoming album:
"It's a GREAT track. I adore it... more than "Hung Up" and its got HIT written all over it.
It's sort of electronic hip hop. It has that Justin Timberlake beats, with electronic blips and low level groans. It's VERY American sounding, BUT VERY European at the same time. The beats and the bass are very Justin Timberlake, Timbaland etc., but there is a whole electronic thing, almost like Mirwais Light. It's very layered. Her voice goes from deep, to high, to spoken. The music has beats, and groans, and blips, and guitars. There is a lot going on.
This could, very well be just a demo... and it may not end up on the final album... but I'm pretty certain it WILL be the lead single and a great way to kick off a new era."
Here are some lyrics to what is thought to be one of Madge's upcoming singles:
See which flavor you like and I'll have it for you
Come on in to my store, I've got candy galore
Dont pretend you're not hungry, I've seen it before
I've got turkish delight baby and so much more
Get up out of your seat (your seat)
Come on up to the dance floor
Ive got something so sweet (so sweet)
Come on up to the front door
I need plenty of heat (heat)
Form a special connection
Just start moving your feet (your feet)
Move on over to me
I'll be your one stop (one stop)
Candy shop (candy shop)
Everything (everything)
That I got (that I got)
I'll be your one stop (one stop)
Candy store (candy store)
Lollipop (lollipop)
Have some more (have some more)
My sugar is raw (erotica whisper)
Stickey and Sweet (high pitched vocoder)
Dance Dance Dance (like erotica moaning kind of echoes throughout whole song)
All the suckers are not what we sell in the store
Chocolate kisses so good
you'll be beggin for more
Dont pretend you're not hungry
Ive got plenty to eat
Come on in to my store
cause my sugar is sweet!
Get up out of your seat (your seat)
Come on up to the dance floor
Ive got something so sweet (so sweet)
Come on up to the front door
I need plenty of heat (heat)
Form a special connection
Just start moving your feet (your feet)
Move on over to me
I'll be your one stop (one stop)
Candy shop (candy shop)
Everything (everything)
That I got (that I got)
I'll be your one stop (one stop)
Candy store (candy store)
Lollipop (lollipop)
Have some more (have some more)
See which flavor you like and I'll have it for you
Come on in to my store, I've got candy galore
Dont pretend you're not hungry, I've seen it before
I've got turkish delight baby and so much more
Get up out of your seat (your seat)
Come on up to the dance floor
Ive got something so sweet (so sweet)
Come on up to the front door
I need plenty of heat (heat)
Form a special connection
Just start moving your feet (your feet)
Move on over to me
I'll be your one stop (one stop)
Candy shop (candy shop)
Everything (everything)
That I got (that I got)
I'll be your one stop (one stop)
Candy store (candy store)
Lollipop (lollipop)
Have some more (have some more)
Sorry, but girlfriend should be using a refillable water bottle...you know she's not refilling that plastic mess. I'm shocked. I've posted about plastic bag usage but it looks like I need to get specific with plastic bottles.
It's on its way!
Madonna, you must stop working out so aggressively! This is madness.
I'm starting to worry that she's an anorexic exerciseaholic. She needs some meat on her bones. I'm scared!
Here are some pics of my girl Madonna leaving her London gym last week. Uh, does she not have veins made for heroin? Not that anyone on earth should do heroin. But those are some meaty veins!
Here are Madonna's covers for Bono's special Vanity Fair issues...Apparently she can only be photographed with people whose last name ends in the "ooo" sound.
...with Djimon Hounsou ("ooo")
...and Maya Angelou ("ooo")
These songs bring back so many awesome memories. Gotta love 'em...almost all of them really!
Rolling Stone: The 25 Greatest Slow Dance Songs Ever
1. “I Don’t Wanna Miss a Thing,” Aerosmith
2. “Unchained Melody,” Righteous Brothers
3. “Crazy For You,” Madonna
4. “Take My Breath Away,” Berlin
5. “I Only Have Eyes for You,” The Flamingos
6. “Never Tear Us Apart,” INXS (THIS SONG STILL MAKES MY HEART PITTER PATTER)
7. “In Your Eyes” Peter Gabriel
8. “Love Song,” The Cure (I HEART THE CURE)
9. “Eternal Flame.” Bangles
10. “I’ll Be There,” The Jackson 5
11. “Always and Forever,” Heat Wave
12. “Fade Into You,” Mazzy Star (was in Swept Away)
13. “I’ll Make Love To You,” Boyz II Men
14. “Faithfully,” Journey
15. “Wild Horses,” Rolling Stones
16. “True Colors,” Cyndi Lauper
17. “How Deep Is Your Love,” Bee Gees
18. “I’ll Be There For You,” Bon Jovi
19. “Drive,” The Cars
20. “Babe,” Styx
21. “Careless Whisper,” Wham!
22. “Save a Prayer,” Duran Duran
23. “Lady In Red,” Chris de Burgh
24. “Hopelessly Devoted to You,” Olivia Newton-John
25. “In the Mouth a Desert,” Pavement
Ugh, they're all so good! Now, please enjoy the "Crazy for You" video:
Online Videos by Veoh.com
Well, Madonna actually belongs to me and my sister...I could never have sole ownership...sis wouldn't let me. ;)
Ms. Thang looked like Ms. Sassy Pants on the set of her directorial debut - a 30 minute short film titled "Filth and Wisdom." While I'm not a fan of her acting (but she does everything else well) I do look forward to this short film. Hope it's awesome!
I can't believe I wasn't casted!
[source]
Madonna showed up at a London strip club called Secrets reportedly to audition "dancers" for her latest project - which could possibly be a short film.
I'll dance for you Madge! 
There were some pics of Madonna earlier this week that seemed to suggest she had gone quite red with her hair but it seemed kinda like the lighting was making it look that way. These daylight pics from yesterday clearly show she is still blond with red high/low lights.
My favorite rebel rouser hit her London pilates gym Monday. I'm still not into the Ed Hardy shirts although this one looks cooler and not as obnoxious as most. Definitely don't like the "Britney Spears pants dragging on the ground" look - that's for sure.
This is the little girl named Grace everyone has been blabbering that Madonna could possibly adopt from an orphanage in Malawi - a country with an estimated 1 million orphans. Of course, most of the rumors are coming from the Daily Mail so there's no telling what is/isn't true until it actually happens.
Madonna's rep insists she is there simply to work on the "Raising Malawi" project. She is there with daughter Lourdes and adopted son David Banda (from Malawi). Click her name link below for Madonna stories over the last week.
Madonna, Lourdes and David, continue their visit to Malawai. How cute does little David Banda look?!
Word was that they were to visit with David's biological father today (Yohane Banda) but we haven't heard anything about the visit. -- Click Madonna's name link below for more pics from Malawai. 
It tortures me to say this but: Maaaaaan, the unibrow and mustache on Lourdes! I'm super surprised Momma Madonna hasn't had those things waxed. On the other hand, it is nice that they're not preoccupied with them. I'm not either. They just really stand out in these pics.
Madonna's boots kick arse! I want them. Click the Madonna name link below for more on their trip to Malawi.
Madonna and little David Banda Ciccone Richie (soon to be anyway) have landed in Malawi via private jet.
Madonna's New York-based publicist Liz Rosenberg said she was in Africa to continue her work with her Raising Malawi organization. She said: "She is overseeing the building of a children's health care centre. She is absolutely not adopting another baby."
Little David's father Yohane Banda has said he would like to visit with his son while they are in the country this time around.
Madonna & daughter Lourdes in the Gumulira Village in Malawi.
[source]
Madonna is due to land in Malawi today and adopted son David is thought to be along for the ride.
Liz Rosenberg, Madonna's rep, said she was headed to Malawi to "continue her work with the Raising Malawi Orphan Care Initiative," but David Banda's father, Yohane Banda, was hoping to see his son.
The Daily Mail quoted Banda as saying, ""Officially I have not heard anything. There has been no communication whatsoever but I have heard the rumours and I get the feeling that she might be coming"...."I understand that she is a busy person but if there is an opportunity, I would appreciate it if she could tell me how my son is doing, which has not been the case so far."
-- I do hope little David and his father get to spend some time together but I also hope that people stop ragging on Madonna for the adoption (even if she did give money to an orphanage to fast-track it). There are well over 100 million orphans in the world who need adopting. Any adoption by stable and responsible people should be applauded. And before you say, "He wasn't an orphan, he has a biological father," remember that a majority of orphans (or kids up for adoption) have at least one parent alive but that parent cannot take care of them.
Madonna did a good thing. Little David is not a new accessory for her.
So we know Madonna is headed to Malawi and her rep denies she is beginning adoption proceedings on a little girl, but The Sun alleges she has picked out a three-year-old girl:
A source said, “Madonna saw a film of children at a place called The Consol Home. She spotted a beautiful girl called Grace who lit the room with her smile, and fell head over heels for her. Madonna kept saying, ‘That girl has so much love in her. I want to help her achieve her potential’.
“But adoption officials are being very strict after the uproar when Madonna adopted David. They know Grace is her first choice, but have insisted she looks at other girls first — and that the final decision is theirs.”
You can be my second mom Madge! Or my 1st dad!
Here are some pics of Madonna going to the gym and to/fromt a Notting Hill recording studio to meet Justin Timberlake.
