Pretty sure that's a penis...

Eva Longoria made a scene of her sunbathing this weekend in Alicante, Spain. She's is really tiny but it looks to me like she's packing some serious meat down below. Ew. I just grossed myself out. Blech.

Quick! Say something funny to clear my brain!

VickyB & Friends at L.A. Galaxy Game

Yes, David Beckham finally made his American debut as the new star of the L.A. Galaxy soccer team and wife VickyB showed her support by drinking champagne in a skybox with the likes of Katie Holmes (and little Suri), Eva Longoria and Tom Cruise's mom.

Chelsea beat Galaxy 1-0. Boooooooooo! But at least we got to see Beckham play for about fifteen minutes. Yummy.

Victoria Beckham and Eva Longoria.

Katie Holmes, Suri Cruise, Victoria Beckham & Eva Longoria.

Beckham has his own website, finally, and he'd like to welcome each of you to it.

Let's Play "Name That Butt!"

Click to enlarge if you can't quite see it. This woman is such a fatty I can't believe she's wearing spandex in public. I kid. But what's up with the crack? Looks like her bum is hungry and eating her alive. Seriously though, I have thread thicker than Ms. Eva.