Friday, June 8, 2007

Lohan Works it Out

Um, seeing Lindsay Lohan working out is as shocking as seeing Britney Spears clothed. These don't look like they were taken at Promises rehab facility. Did she bust out already?

Maybe she was just warming up for a jog to her dealer's house.

I Thought Kanye West Was 50?!

Joss Stone and eyeliner sharing couple Pete Wentz & Ashlee Simpson were three of the peeps who attended Kanye West's 30th birthday party in NYC last night (June 7).

Wentz will always be a man whore to me. Ashlee is gorgeous but the nose is faker than fake...just so manufactured. Seriously though, I didn't realize Kanye West was so young. He's got the ego and attitude of a man 20 years older than his 30 years!

Chicks Dig Her

Avril Lavigne and two friends were digging one another as they danced at a club in Las Vegas. I could see Avril loving "girl time" she and her hubby have an "open marriage" on that front.

But I want to know: What song would get Avril dancing up a storm? She acts like such rebel wannabe punker chic. Doubt it's Britney Spears!

Mariah's Lookin' Good

Ms. Mariah Carey is clearly working out and/or eating healthy again because she is much slimmer and I actually see muscle definition in her arms! Good work Mariah - keep it up.

Ms. Thang was photographed last night (June 7) at the Fresh Air Fund Salute to American Heroes.

Alicia Keys was there looking all girly...

Since I've Been Gone

I have been ill and away for weeks now...wouldn't ya know it, some juicy stuff happened! For instance:

1. Lindsay Lohan crashed her car and cocaine was found in her car. She fled the scene and was later arrested at the hospital (like she needed to go - there's video of her running away from the scene of the accident) for suspicion of DUI.

2. Lindsay Lohan was seen falling as she left a club and passed out in her lesbian lover's car (Samantha Ronson).

3. Lindsay Lohan entered Promises rehab facility (the facility who famously sucked at helping Britney Spears get better...she's been out drunk and dirty lately.).

4. Lindsay Lohan's boyfriend Calum Best was photographed allegedly snorting coke off of a hooker's stomach. NICE. Effing scumbag. Lindsay then dumped him. Ya think?!

5. John Mayer and Jessica Simpson broke up...again.

6. Paris Hilton went to jail.

7. Paris Hilton was released from jail.

8. Bon Jovi rocker Richie Sambora went into word on whether Denise Richards will follow.

9. George Michael has been banned from driving and was sentenced to community service as a result of getting busted awhile back passed out and slumped over the steering wheel of his car after drugging it up.

10. Photos of partying Lindsay Lohan and Vanessa Minnillo holding knives to eachother's throats were leaked. I'm already so tired of all these girls again.

11. Paris Hilton was ordered back to jail today.

PHEW! I didn't list everything but, man, things have been crazy. Good to be back folks.


BREAKING NEWS! Paris Hilton has been ordered back to jail. JUSTICE SERVED BIOTCH! Guess tonight's party is cancelled. Boohoo.

Reports are that she was on the verge of a nervous breakdown so they sent her home. Duh, look at the life she is used to living. Suck it up you little rat. You said you were going to serve your time - accept responsibility - that you hoped your fans learned from your mistakes.

I have no sympathy for this girl. You know her ass went home from jail at 2 a.m. and proceeded to laugh at the justice system. Her flat ass was celebrating her "escape" from know it.

Winehouse's Exercise Program

Everyone wants to blame alcohol and drugs for Amy Winehouse's crazy weight loss but it looks like it could actually be a result of jogging across the street to the corner store with that bouffant on her head for some Dr. Pepper and ciggies.

Note the "Blake's" tattoo above her let boob. People never learn.

1 Paris Pic

Ok, I'll post a shot of Paris today...her bawling in the back of a Sheriff's car on her way back to court to find out if she will be sent back to jail.

Medical condition my ass. They have nurses, doctors, psychiatric wards, etc., in jail. This biotch was preparing to have a party tonight. A party! If you are too ill or fragile for jail - you're too ill to party.

She has been doing nothing but thumbing her damn beak at the justice system and it is time she learned a lesson. Eff off Paris.

Can't Let 1st Celebrity Post Since My Health Scare Be Paris Hilton So Here's Some Brangelina!

Yeah, that sums it up. Even though I've been watching the live coverage of Paris heading back to court because the Judge and Prosecuters are pissed the Sheriff let her out of jail early - I can't possibly post about her first though - Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie are far more interesting and relevant anyway.

Brangelina were looking super sexy at the Ocean's 13 premier in Hollywood at Grauman's Chinese Theatre. Brad looks like he's gotten some Botox recently...he's looking quite firm and unlined. Hmmmm...


OMG, I can't even begin to explain what has happened and where I've been for the last 2-3 weeks so I'll just leave it at this:

1. Undergoing fertility treatment and massive amount of eggs were retrieved on May 26.

2. I proceeded to get really sick over the next week, was rushed by ambulance to the hospital last Thursday because of dehydration over 3 days & blood pressure was dropping...given 3 liters of IV fluids and pain meds in ER. Blood pressure stabilized.

3. My doctor ordered me to Atlanta and hubby and I drove there the next morning. I was immediately admitted to the hospital for 3 days of IV fluids, pain meds & they inserted a catheter into my stomach to drain almost 6 liters of fluids that my body was unable to absorb.

4. Catheter was removed Monday, kidneys were fully functional again and I was able to finally come home. Just now really starting to get my strength back so Celebrity Upchuck should be up and running again here...slowly but surely.

THANK YOU for all of your well wishes, inquiries, regular visits checking for updates, etc. I love my Upchucking chirrens!

Celebrity Upchuck