Conversations of the Classless

with Greasy Bear Davis and Kim "WTF is my job?" Kardsashian at the Mercedes Benz fashion show in Miami last night. It is being reported that Brandon "Greasy Bear" Davis's family has finally cut him off because he refuses to clean up his act (or just shower for that matter).

Greasy Bear: Got $2,000 or $10,000 I can borrow?

Kardashian: Um, I thought you were a billion-HEIR.

Greasy Bear: My family cut me off...something about no job, too many drugs, too much alcohol, being worthless. Do you believe this sh*t?

*awkward silence*

Greasy Bear: So, you got that money?

Karsashian: You think these ass implants were free dude? I made $100 off that sex tape with Ray-J.

Greasy Bear: WTF?!?!

Kardashian: I know, I know. But with these ass and boob implants I can surely make $200 on the next one.

Greasy Bear: So you're broke too?...Don't talk to me.

Kardashian: F.U. dude. WTF are you always so greasy and nasty anyway? Not like you work out. Stop talking to me.

Greasy Bear: No. You don't talk to me...until you've got that $2k you owe me.

Greasy Bear Blows

Gotta love when an arsehole is made to look like a bigger one than he already is! Paris Hilton's one-time BFF, nasty dude Brandon "Greasy Bear" Davis, showed up to the Details magazine party March 29th at producer Mary Parent's house in Hollywood and flipped out when he was denied access. According to Page Six:

‘According to our spy, “he started demanding that staffers get Stavros [Niarchos].” The Greek shipping heir had evidently told Davis about the party and was already inside. But when staffers found Niarchos, he begged them to tell Davis that he wasn’t there, adding, “I didn’t invite him here, and I don’t really want to be around him.” Niarchos then joined the other revelers. Davis eventually made such a fuss that he was allowed in - and Niarchos beelined to a Details editor to apologize, adding, “You know I would never bring him here.”‘

LOVE IT LOVE IT LOVE IT!

Best News of the Day: Greasy Bear Davis...

...is still bouncing checks! Last year the greasy loser bounced a $10,000 check to sleazebag Joe "Girls Gone Wild" Davis and now TMZ is reporting the grease ball is being sued by the Atlantis resort/casino (Paradise Island, Bahamas) after a $75,000 check he wrote in January BOUNCED. BAHHHHHH! This scum makes me laugh out loud while simultaneously wanting to punch him in the face.

They should jail him in the scummiest - most violent - prison in existence. That'll teach him.

Greasy Bear Davis RIPPED by MC

Brandon Davis is capable of few things: 1) Looking greasier than a McDonald's deep-fryer. 2) Eating, drinking, drugging. 3) Talking sh*t to people in a failed effort to be cool. AND 3) Looking and living like the worthless waste of air and space that he is.

Which is why I was delighted to read the following New York Daily News bit:

* Oil-heir bad boy Brandon Davis can't get away with his nasty remarks in New York. When Paris Hilton's L.A. hanger-on insulted the deejay at The Box on Chrystie St. Saturday night, a spotlight was turned on him and an onstage MC "ripped on him for like 10 minutes," reports our spywitness. "He didn't even know who Brandon was — that was the best part."

Doesn't this just make you smile and giggle out loud?! I could live for days on the energy it has given me! Click the Pretty on the Outside pic to truly appreciate it.

Greasy Bear Davis Ruined Paris's BDay

(Art by Gallery of the Absurd)(click to see larger)

The New York Daily News is reporting that Brandon "Greasy Bear" Davis was his usual nasty self at Parisites birthday dinner at Prime Grill in Hollywood Saturday night.

The only stars (term used very loosely; see photo) she could get to show up were Courtney Love, Nicole Richie, Joel Madden & Paula Abdul...wait, Paula Abdul? WTF?!

Anyhow, NYDN reports as follows:

But around 10 p.m., Davis started acting up. "He was hurling flowers at Paula Abdul," says a guest. "Then he began bombing her with Styrofoam flower-holders. He was shouting, 'Lick my [BLEEP], Paula!' He started mocking her ancestry by speaking gibberish in an Arabic accent.

"Stavros and Paris tried to stop him. Paris said, 'Shut up, you're wasted!'" But it was too late. Abdul, who was due to sing "Happy Birthday," made an early exit.

Davis then turned his dim beams on Love. "He lifted her up so that she was straddling his waist," says a witness. "Her Chanel dress was riding up. Brandon was saying, 'I want to squirt on you.' He was humping Courtney in front of her daughter, Frances Bean. When he put her down, Courtney grabbed Frances and they marched out of the restaurant through the kitchen."

It didn't stop there. "He was knocking over glasses and candles on the table," says a source. "Paris was crying to her mother, 'This is not my fault!'"

I LOVE IT! I LOVE IT! I LOVE IT!

2 NASTIES HAVING A SH*TTEOUS TIME!

Now, if someone would just smack her again and really leave a mark -- my day would be complete.